If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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