You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize