ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
