she smelled like a LAN party
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
3pm strippers are depressing
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize