Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
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