I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize