Betty ford says i'm here all night
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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