I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Randomize