If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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