Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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