he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
