Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
