Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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