brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
