C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
