I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
He better not be in your backpack
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
