I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
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