i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I have feelings that need drinking.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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