Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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