What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
