guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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