$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
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