Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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