I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
