She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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