i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
