I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
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