I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
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