dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
