I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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