It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
