Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
