it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
