My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
