My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
