Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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