i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize