Dual....:-)
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
