Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Randomize
