Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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