frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
