Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
two words: eviction party
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
