My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
