mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
