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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize