Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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