Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(514): View more from Quebec

just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.

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(305): View more from Florida

Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.

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(925): View more from California

I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'

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(857): View more from Massachusetts

Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.

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(240): View more from Maryland

You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.

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(909): View more from California

I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.

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