He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
