If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
