I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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