Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
You did what with his pubic hair?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
