I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
A+ Viking dick
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
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