She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
PANTIES FOUND
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